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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| I am a goat in a moat with a boat . who's got the crack?
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| i'm seeing stars. incredible amounts of stars. everything is a haze. lost in translation is one of the most beautiful portrayals of human loneliness. Remember when people would say things like "loneliness is the human condition"? That movie really makes me agree with that, because its almost like they choose to be alone. maybe just to have the chance to reach out all over again. i don't make sense because i don't sleep. i don't sleep because i'm troubled. i'm troubled because i'm lonely and can't sleep.
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| i went to the library yesterday! it was great; incredibly refreshing. i collected every worthy book i could find. leaving with just under 10 jewels. i watched "Because I Said So" and have since been coveting hand tattoos. i wanted to buy a friend a gift, so i went to the mall, where i was accosted by a young accented Rico Suave who whispered rather than spoke and wouldn't take no for an answer. he quizzed me on the dead sea, and buffed my nail with his 'dazzling product' that was "just for me, 60 per cent off." i pretended to be interested and flattered, then snickered at him with my cousin behind his back. girls can be so heartless. i was curious about the age of the son of the handy man that works on my house. i asked. only to be embarrassed by my aunt who yells "sorry, but he's too young!" from the next room. the son, Soren, (come on, the name alone forced me to ask) shied away into the kitchen where he whispers to his dad that he's actually a year older than reported. a whopping 17.
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| The Sex Talk (my vignette of the day):
It is a curious moment in a mother-daughter relationship when the female/male anatomy is discussed and sex is "discovered." However, it is even more curious--shocking in fact-- when Mother must come to the realization that Daughter "knows all about sex already" and isn't ashamed to discuss penises and vaginae (the actual plural of 'vagina'). It is plain amusing when kayla gets to witness such an ocassion.
(WARNING: explicit language may follow)
Daughter: mom, kayla, we need to discuss something. i'm telling you that that Renew lotion causes my private to smell bad! Mother: it does not! it's not the lotion; it's your stink butt. Kayla: well, to tell you the truth 'Daughter,' you may have to become familiar with the two unfriendly words: vaginal discharge. (whispered into Daughter's ear; Daughter shrieks and revolts in violent convulsions) Mother: (laughing) what did you say? 'gina juice?!' Kayla: EWWW! why the HELL would I say that?! i merely said 'vaginal discharge.' i am educated, you know. M: whatever. the point is, Daughter, do you understand about cleaning down there? D: duh! i've had it my whole life. M: yeah, but i mean...(awkward pause) really being sure you are clean. D: you mean, like, about the flaps? (kayla bursts out in uncontrollable obnoxious laughter, almost crashes car) M: umm yeah, (stifling laughter) that. Daughter, is it time we talk about sex? D: what is there to say? i already know it all. M: (snorts, rolls eyes) oh, i doubt that! i'm being serious. you need to know some basic differences about boys and girls and why it isn't the lotion you need to worry about. D: are you referring to wet dreams? i don't get those. (kayla violently halts car, and scared for their lives and the uncontrollable pain laughter has produced in her side, she asks for the conversation to be postponed till they get home.)
this has been a retelling of true events, scout's honour. sorry if you didn't find it near as halarious/gross as the actual experience was. and Joel, i would like to personally apologize to you. (kind of )
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| The sum of many parts.
...Does it hurt when you walk?...
...She just stared at him, she just stared at him, she just stared at him...
remember the villages we would fly through as kids? The rooftops we would gracefully graze with our toes, sigh at with our unforgiving eyes. Oh, to be you! What a life! We would laugh until we cried and then laugh at the fact that we were crying. remember the waterfalls we dreamed? The adventures spent darting to and fro, a mermaid's life for me. O, if Poseidon could see us now! We would peddle the water and throw back our carefree heads with howls of the moment's grace. Do sea cucumbers really pee?
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